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1. He’s unqualified. He doesn’t have a profession. He’s trained as a lawyer, recently started an “investment firm.” He hasn’t held a job in his life for more than a year or two.

2. When the nation, two years ago, was facing challenges on several fronts—mismanaged wars, soaring deficits, an economy falling down a sinkhole, Quayle was nowhere to be seen.

3. Did he offer his opinions or advice? Take a public stand? Maybe even point out that, as a Republican, he was troubled by the holy mess his party had gotten the country in?

4. No. Instead, he was helping a friend get a porny web site off the ground. It was called Dirty Scottsdale, with a plan for establishing itself as Skank Central for the sleazy nightlife crowd.

5. When the economy was collapsing, Ben was writing for the site under the name Brock Landers, and went on a search for “Scottsdale’s foxiest first lady!”

6. Ben moved to the district recently and got a congressional campaign going. His main funding source: Friends of his daddy’s! Former president Bush held a fundraiser for him in Texas! In Texas—for a guy from Phoenix who’s done nothing his entire life.

7. Then it came out that Ben had a skanky past. When questioned… he denied it. Then changed his story. Then said “My response has been consistent.”

8. The Arizona Republic, which used to be owned by his family, helped him out by carefully not going into any detail about his involvement with the porny web site during the Republican primary.


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9. In that primary he got about 22 percent of the vote. It was a crowded field; that was enough to win. Even Republicans don’t like him.

10. To get attention, Little Benny ran a commercial saying “Barack Obama is the worst president in history.” Sane people know that Barack Obama isn’t even the worst president of the 21st century.

11. He dodged debates with his opponent, Jon Hulburd, finally agreeing to one half-hour session.

12. His public events have been nil. PHXated’s repeatedly asked his campaign for a single time he’s made a scheduled public appearance. There hasn’t been one we know of.

13. His campaign has also refused to answer basic questions about his positions. There are candidates running for ASU class president who have more substantive issue pages. Does he think woman should be jailed for having an abortion? Should gays be allowed openly to serve in the military? To our knowledge, Quayle has never answered these questions.